Vanurtle

@vanurtle.bsky.social

I know I seem like so autonomous but I'm actually partnered with refraction of light so let me run it by the old prism first. Hey bendy straw sucking the crazy light outta me, more like dispersing my will amirite

Had a hot bath and soaked in my failure to be on schedule. In a bright, cheery, perfect world, everything is on time and even ahead of schedule. Woot! What a place to be!

Going to need some help getting by on hospital release, benefits have been stopped because ive been in hospital over 3 weeks so need to reapply, I have little cash left for topping up electricity and getting in groceries, phone needs topped up. Pls help if you can PP: Tinasmithzef51@gmail.com

If you can’t appreciate “low brow “ humor, I assume you didn’t have an older sibling who’d randomly walk into the living room where you were quietly reading, loudly fart, and declare, “…Annnd that’s what I have to say about that!” before exiting.

The world was once dots connected by lines as far as the eventual shape could hope but then came the wrapper from a crayon and whammo. Flat earths do not roll off the table either, it's the color fast using just one side rubbing theory

Listening to karaoke is a lot like when my kids had to learn the recorder for school. You have to be very supportive while trying not to get pissed off by the sound.

If you close your eyes and wish hard enough, when you open your eyes all your laundry will be clean and folded. (If it isn't, you probably didn't wish hard enough. Try again. Maybe count to ten this time. You never know.)