my favorite part of automobile maintenance is when the car guy brings me a part and says, “look how messed up this is” and I’m like “yeah, totally” and we both know i have no idea what they’re showing me and we both know i’m gonna pay for a new whizdongle anyway

Introducing the Cool S, For Her™

I don’t want books written by AI, I want books written by alcoholic Russian novelists on the brink of a mental collapse from depression

i dont have a stream of consciousness i have a stream of confusion

well aren’t you just a little glitch in the matrix

the existence of muppet babies necessitates the existence of muppet intercourse

I have it from a reliable source that BMW is sunsetting turn signals and low beams

treat your body like a data center. consume as much water, art and literature as possible. upset local municipalities with your existence.

My quirks aren't interesting, they are insane.

a flash mob where we all start crying at the same time

my hips dont lie but theyve been known to cheat and steal

the jenson episode really stuck with me

This Is What a Real Trans Ally Looks Like

YouTube video by TrueBlue

youtube.com

Weball allows you to roll up websites into a Katamari ball. You can even roll up KDO. This is too much fun. See also Destroy Any Website. [funwithcomputervision.com]

weball

roll, grow, win the internet

funwithcomputervision.com

*Dissociates into the sun*

The worst part of my day is when I’m close to being encumbered and I have to sort through my inventory to figure out what to sell, drop, or keep. What a fucking chore.

a pet peeve: the 2019 Lion King is not "live action." it is simply more realistic animation.

Having a psychotic break, but whimsically.

Considering cutting a hole through the roof at work to fix the bad reception that only happens specifically at my desk. Let those beautiful 5g waves innnn

angel food? you mean ramen

are people still buying houses with basement hell portals

My therapist is so mad at you guys

Please read my bestseller. Deleted by Author.

sure i have bad posture. but at least i'm tired all the time

*Unsubscribes from consciousness*

I'm not disappointed, I'm just mad.

cringe your way to confidence

*exhaling vape* not guilty, your honor

Thought this was cool: 9 games that shaped who I am https://my9games.net/en/share/73c8a0b3-f9e3-48fd-8bdd-abf6705c837a

Yeah, I'm Gender Critical. The scientists say if I take on any more gender, it could trigger a meltdown for the entire system

Even if you've only done the Macarena once, you're still a carrier