Raquel Squelch
@raquelsquelch.bsky.social
if you don't get it there are a lot of great things in other places out there for you to get avi by mike miller more writing⤵️ https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaagsq7wlqhoe
Crazy how People is the remaining publication that just goes for the jugular.
Mitch McConnell Was Rolled into Ambulance with ‘No Urgency,’ According to Eyewitness Who Filmed Him Lying Still Under Blanket
A video reportedly depicting Kentucky Sen. Mitch McConnell, who has been hospitalized for nearly a month, being placed in an ambulance on a stretcher in mid-June has been published by CNN
people.com
I just sneezed and an entire roll of sushi came out of my nose.
ME: oh man, just had a huge weight lifted off my shoulders SISYPHUS: [one eye twitching extremely violently]
If anyone even knew the speed of sound do you really think we'd actually be using two stopwatches connected with a string to talk about who's gonna hang up first
Friend: Why did you put a suit on your dog? Me: Because he's a setter. Friend: Don't say it. Me: A trend setter. Friend: I hate you.
If you like the smell of truck stop bathrooms, you're gonna LOVE marriage!
this new deodorant scent got me introducing myself to myself
It's too hot and sticky for anything but bare legs and vibing but my boss still rejected my last-minute PTO request
“There was no autism in my day” my stepdad tells strangers his spider solitaire score
Now, a message from Rev. Thurl H. "Skeet" Ravenscrof: Vodka Shot Bingo 7p to floor. I can no longer drink, but don't let that stop you from having fun. I'll be okay. Go ahead and set off an M-80 over by the skunk farm. Play strip poker with the nuns. I'll be fine with a jigsaw puzzle. God bless.
why are they called blue maga and not insane in the dem brain
don’t ask me to water your plants and then FREAK OUT when you see me naked on your Ring camera THIS IS HOW I LIKE TO WATER
Most of the women you know are one situationship and a few fun nun podcast clips on TikTok away from joining the Dominican sisterhood
Yes, there is a secret casino hidden within the casino, and it’s where you can bet with weird stuff like baby teeth and jars of moss.
in my previous life I was an Egyptian who used a sarcophagus as a canoe on the Nile as a practical joke and you could hear the laughs from Cairo to goddam Alexandria
is that a hyperlink in your post bro? i will never click a "hyperlink". put that hyperlink away.
No, it's fine that you forgot my birthday. I will only remember it for the next 64 years
[buying our National Parks Pass] Me: Can we get one without Trump's face on it? Cashier: No, sorry. A lot of people ask that though.
CUSTOMER: “I still don’t understand.” PRODUCE CLERK: “You see sir, they are simultaneously grapes, and yet not grapes.” MANAGER: “Get back to work, Schrödinger.”
midwife: congratulations you have a beautiful baby girl, do you have a name? me: yes my parents were very thorough
I took an IQ test and I am a brick, but a brick with a good head for logic (and smashing).
I'm on a bus from Atlantic City to New York City and the woman in the seat behind me has spent the entire ride talking about cheesecake. She's like a cheesecake savant. I can't remember a time before cheesecake.
