Cicadas are wild. Imagine having someone who's been living under a rock for several years now hanging outside your window screaming, "who wants some sex?!" for hours.

Intromezzo: the point where you stop binge-watching the show to go find out what the full version of the theme song sounds like

Are you a game developer? Do choices matter in your game? Sign ups for the 2026 edition of the successful Choose Wisely Festival and Showcase are now open! Join us in celebrating branching narrative games! Open globally to developers of all sizes. 📝 cutt.ly/CWF26DevSignUp #ChooseWiselyFestival

My dad installed a boathouse for my squirrels

Cats are wise, in their unique cattish way. Just observe. Do cats wake up one day, and decide to go camping?

The bathroom smells like hash browns and now I'm both confused and hungry

YOU GET NOTHING! YOU LOSE! GOOD DAY, SIR!

I shout a little joke to the other villagers in the angry mob. Nobody laughs. Probably just busy with mob activities

I think the British spelling of diarrhoea better reflects the loosening of the vowels

James Damron@runswindows95.bsky.social · 3w ago

I love how the diarrhea jokes are still running...

people who have never played tetris should have to prove themselves before being allowed to pack anything unsupervised

20 years ago we used to have Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs and now we have Johnny Diarrhea, Bob Diarrhea and Steve Diarrhea.

(Attenborough voice) Now, older and calmer, it appears as though the honey badger cares too much

I’ll say a prayer for you, but just so you know it’s going to be REO Speedwagon lyrics

My founding fathers

The A-Team Members Walking Together

Alt: The A-Team Members Walking Together

static.klipy.com

Salty in the South@saltyinthesouth.bsky.social · last mo.

My founding fathers

I’m afraid the worst has come to pass… my dog has formed a dog gang at boarding

i think if you’re going to collect husbands they should each have a unique production flaw that makes them more valuable to trade later (and for gosh sakes don’t ever take them out of the box)

There once was a man from Nantucket, but I never met him so I can’t really tell you any more than that.

those hawaiian kings sure know how to make great rolls

driving my mom’s 2010 jeep liberty that smells like cigarettes and cost me $74 to fill up to an airport 1.5 hours away so i could get a nonstop flight to the east coast with a large iced coffee from 7Brew, this is middle america, folks.

setting out a jar of mayonnaise for uncle sam tonight

Smoking on that shit that makes you Gary for the rest of your life

new metaphor just dropped

weekend plans

"With that hat and that beard I thought for a second you were an old person." - My Six Year Old Nephew

I know this is not the biggest concern going these days, but it stresses me out that basically every artist/writer/critic is now expected to create their own tiny empire instead of getting paid by any existing entity to perform a job they've worked to get good at!!!!

I never realized how much a seagull sounds like the laughing guy in a Mariachi band.

I just saw a TV commercial in which two women talk thirstily about how sexy an anthropomorphic colon cancer screening kit is while it mows the lawn. I think they missed this part in the book of Revelation.

Just passed a mirror and realised I've been walking around all day with a lobster tangled in my hair

Sitting on the porch all day peeling and pitting a whole family size bag of peanut m&ms

May have been a tactical error to go "Now you done it, New York, you're gonna see what REAL SOCIALISM looks like!!!" right before the snow got cleared and the Knicks won